 |
| Bandage from the Implanon insertion. Please excuse the drainage/bruising |
My last month of pregnancy I remember fantasizing about getting "back to my old self" and just kept saying... I can't wait to feel like ME again! Little did I know, that was never going to happen again. I don't feel like my "old self", I am now a "new self". My body is completely different, my thoughts are different, my time is different. My entire day and schedule is based on the needs of someone else, I sleep only when she sleeps, and my needs are only met once her needs are. It truly is a lesson on how to be selfless. You love with out being loved in return. I have never had to be selfless before, but since the day I brought Macy home, I have been a different person. With all of the giving though, I must say, I am so thankful for the help of my husband! He is always thinking for me, and intentionally takes the baby so I can take a long shower, a nap, or go run errands by myself. He even booked an HOUR AND A HALF massage for me for my birthday!
 |
| Sweet Macy and I the day after my bday, on the 4th |
About 2 weeks after I had the baby I started to realize the toll the pregnancy took on my body. The more weight that fell off, the more I could see what my body had gone through. As someone who has had body issues since I was a little girl, I really had to protect my thoughts against hating my new body. The stretch marks, loose skin, no muscle definition- it is not easy to look at in the mirror, and the thought of having to get in a bathing suit, especially around my kid-free friends, is going to be the toughest. BUT, at the end of the day, I know it is just another sacrifice you make for your children. I had such a great pregnancy, I have a healthy baby, I guess something had to give, I can't have it all. ((This is what I tell myself to feel better))
At 4 weeks post partum I did start running on the treadmill about 3 days a week and it has been really nice. It takes some strategic planning around Macy's schedule, but I always feel so much better after. I am looking forward to cooler weather and getting of the house more with the jogging stroller. The hot weather has given me a terrible case of cabin fever! I am definitely going to do my best to feel better about myself, my "new self" that is.
 |
| Couch to 5K program, a baby monitor and the treadmill... My new way of working out! |
I write this entry to say- it isn't easy being a new mom, sacrificing your time or body- but it is so worth it. It is God's calling for my life to be Macy Jane's mommy and for that I am grateful. I mean seriously, she is the cutest, sweetest little thing I have ever had the joy of being around!
 |
| My heart explodes just looking at this picture! |
I hear you, sister. ;) You will get back into shape physically....it just takes time. It is hard to make something a priority when it will never be your #1 priority - which is your child, as it should be. And that #1 priority happens to be very time consuming.... and adorably worth it. ;) When I was in the midst of feeling bad about myself physical-appearance wise after having H, one day I just woke up and I was like... "You know, being skinny isn't everything. It so isn't. And, I think I have a pretty darn good reason to not be skinny right now." Sounds so silly/simple, but it was huge for me. And I didn't use that as an excuse, I actually started getting serious about working out after that realization. It was just that I was suddenly realizing my value beyond what I looked like on the outside. Oh motherhood... it teaches you so much... selflessness and at the same time- self-appreciation, value, worth. It's amazing. I'm here if you need encouragement! (Although, I know you have awesome family and friends for that.) I recently wrote a post about losing baby weight on my blog. Having just been there, I know where you are! Hugs :)
ReplyDeleteHi Ashley! This is Shera. I hope you don't mind me stalking your blog :) I loved this post. Being a new mom is so tough and I can totally relate, but it sounds like you are doing great. Your new baby is adorable, so I am sure that makes it easier! Also, every time I see your pics on facebook, I think how great you look, ecspecially since you just had a baby, so don't be too hard on yourself. Congrats!!
ReplyDeleteHey Shera thanks for the encouragement! You have a beautiful family! I love stalking all your pics :)
DeleteHello Ashley! My name is Stacy and I am a friend of Betsy's. I am getting Nexplanon next week and was wondering if you like the Implanon? I have heard both positive and negative results. I understand if this may too personal and won't take offense if you wish to reply. If you prefer email mine is toole.stacy@gmail.com.
ReplyDelete