I have always grown up going to church, but it wasn't until my adulthood that I truly understood the role Jesus, my Lord and Savior, played in my life. I read scripture and I understood it. I consistently started meeting with God, investigating His Word, and craving daily time alone with Him. The more I understand Jesus, the more excited and important Christmas is in my life.
Reading the Christmas story I get lost in the thought of how amazing it would be to be around when first hearing the Messiah had come. The long awaited King, had came. How sovereign God was in his planning of Jesus' birth. How God took on the form of flesh, not a king that was born in a palace, but a simple man, born in poverty in a dirty stable, and worked hard with his hands. He was born poverished and died disgraced. He was a human that we all could relate to. He endured pain and suffering, and even cried out to God to make it stop. But he was faithful and perfect. And his sole purpose on earth was to save me, a sinner, and imperfect person. I still have a hard time fathoming God's grace over my life, forgiving me for my inequities every single day, as I continue to fail over and over.
This year as a parent, I am even more emotional thinking of Christ's birth. God sent his son, his baby, knowing fair well the life of suffering he would endure. The heartbreak that God had for him, and for all of us. That God loves us so much, that he would send His only son down to save us. A love that never fails, a love I could never return.
As Macy and our future children grow, I want to make a vow that Christmas will always be about Jesus. About what a gift he is, and that he is enough. Of course we will get our children gifts, and have traditions just like I did as a child, but we will worship Jesus, not the presents that lay under the tree.
After this past weeks events, I am even more confident in my Lord. That I need him, that I can't live my life without him. Since the day Adam and Eve sinned against God, the world has been a dark place. It is not a question of "how could God let that happen" but a statement of "wow, we need a savior". And God sent us just that. Your salvation is so important, this world of darkness can easily consume you, and now we must cling on the the Promise. The promise for redemption, forgiveness, and for salvation. Life here on earth is but a breath, our eternal life awaits us. Let it be on Heaven, let it be in a place of no pain, no darkness, no monsters.
I can't wait to share my first Christmas as a mommy with my family and sweet baby girl. Rejoicing in everything that Christmas truly stands for!
"O holy night!
The stars are brightly shining
It is the night
Of the dear Savior's birth!
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Till he appear'd and the soul felt His worth
A thrill of hope
The weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks
A new and glorious morn!
Fall on your knees
Oh hear the angel voices
Oh night divine"